For a multitude of reasons, managing joint custody is a challenge. Particularly if you and your ex-spouse are not on the best of terms, you might be struggling with the best way to communicate effectively with him or her.
Like with many things involving communication, much relies on your mindset. The first thing is to frame communication with your ex as a linchpin for your child’s well-being. According to HelpGuide, treating communication with your ex-spouse as strictly business and focusing on restraint is a good way to ensure that your communications are kid-centered.
It is highly likely that your ex-spouse is aware of how to push your buttons. This is where treating communication with your ex as a business exercise comes in handy. For instance, You may wish to limit all communications to email only. This will give you plenty of time to cool off in the event that your ex writes something that makes you angry. You can then take your time and respond when you are calmer.
Start thinking of your ex-spouse as your co-parent rather than “ex-spouse.” The spousal part is now over, and your relationship is now contingent upon raising your children and nothing else.
You will need to at least have a cordial business relationship with your ex until your children reach the age of majority. Work on not overreacting to the things that your ex says and does that are not directly related to your child’s well-being. This will slowly result in your ex having less direct control over your emotions and reducing their amount of emotional power.